Had a blast last night. Stayed out too late. Up too early. And so happy I went!
Very little food though. Again. I tried. I did eat though! One cheese stick. One fourth of fried pickle. and a bite of chicken wing! lol Ok so to many it doesn't sound like much, but for me that's HUGE!
The eating thing is hard for me. I do get hungry. And I LOVE food. I have to jump on it when it comes, like seriously, if I feel hungry I have to IMMEDIATELY eat, or it passes and may not come around again for hours. :/ Very odd for me. I could go without sugar, or junk food for days, but I do love my carbs. But it has to be ready and sitting in front of me, or I am lazy and just don't care, and then a whole day goes by, and I've forgotten. Yea yea I will work on that......
Went to the Moose last night bald. But had a hat. The only place I feel comfortable without hiding. ;) My vanity gets the best of me at times. But being a member there almost 10 yrs I feel as though most of them are family. And I had some friends come along, old and new. Very cool. Very fun. And a night where I felt very close to being normal. I had a sitter here who adores the baby as much as me, so I was really able to relax and not give it a thought. I will say I am blessed there. I have a few girls that are so perfect for my little guy! Simon has a few girls that he asks for, and I feel very lucky because when these girls help me with him, I can really not give a second thought, and focus on some fun. :) Will say I miss my Allie, chickie goes to camp in the summer, BUT she lives within walking distance and comes to see us, even not when sitting! BIG shout out to Paige, though, her second sitting with Simon, and she is good for my moral too. Her mama raised her right. Both have a VERY close spot in my heart. Both make me feel beautiful and normal.
Today is the 4th of July. Picnic day, god willing I feel well. :) I don't want to think about tomorrow. Chemo again. Blah. BUT today is a holiday, hoping for an appitite!! ALWAYS the best food at Mick and Cheryls picnic!! I KNOW that Donna will have her cheesy tater casserole there!!! Please Lord, let me have an appitite! lol...maybe i will take a plate home just in case! Knowing I may get the urge to eat at any point when I am home, I may get the urge to eat!
I think I repeat myself a lot. I'm not 100% sure, because I don't read my posts. I don't want to. But I write so that I can look back.....way down the road when I'm cured and remember, if needed, to embrace life, and cherish each healthy day once this over. I'm hoping and praying my thoughts are helping someone out there cancer or not and being and saying what really happens throughout all this. My goal is that posts help someone. Anyone. Whether they have cancer or not. NOT is even better! I pray they find a cure that doesn't require a weekly poison.
I still laugh every night before bed when I run bathroom water to wash my makeup off, set my clean wash rag out and grab my headband to put on to keep my hair from being soaped. LOL I toss the headband and laugh each time! I think I should move them.....old habits are hard to break!
You all now you do the same thing!!!! When your electricity is out and you walk into a room and hit the light switch! ;)
Ok, off to make a cup of tea...and my Umar (bff friend from WAYYYYY back) sent me his mama's pistachio bread to have a slice this a.m. Hoping IT will stay down.
OOPS forgot, I got more presents last night too, my Jess (another bff) got me a new princess hat! woop woop! maybe where it to chemo...blah, moving on. Don't wanna go. This will be first one without my sister. :( Mom is taking me. Shelly needs a day to herself. And Miss Tiff always stops in, that makes it easier. I don't think Tiff has missed one yet either <3 .
Happy 4th to all!!! Enjoy your day. Hug your loved ones!!!! And as always....
God Bless!!
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